I find myself now fighting hard to not be a recluse after this last year – I no longer have motivation to go to most things. Yet, kink is near and dear to my heart, so is socializing. I need to pursue my passions again. An event I couldn’t see myself missing was a GRUE (Graydancer’s Ropetastic Unconference Extraganza).
Mr Texas almost went, for at least half the day (kid commitment), but I told him it was going to my agenda and I didn’t him following me along the whole time like a lost puppy. He stated he wanted to learn what my kinks and interests were, therefore justifying in advance that he would be with me the whole time. He ended up not going for other reasons. I truly think if he would have went, he would have learned a whole lot…regardless of whether he was there or not – that’s the wonder of being in a GRUE.
So there I was alone. The GRUE is almost perfect for being alone, for pursuing an individual’s agenda/interest/curiosity/seeing-something-offered-you-never-even-thought-of. Everyone is so welcoming and friendly if approached that I was confident if I needed a partner, I would be able to find one – though I wasn’t really planning on needing one. One thing I’ve noticed is that I don’t enjoy rope as much as I used to – perhaps deserving of its own post.
The night before, I was exhausted from travel and holiday time, from moving furniture for three days straight to Mr. Texas house, so I decided to sleep rather than make the meet and greet dinner.
Fighting lovely Los Angeles traffic and rain on top of that, I located the event and stepped inside.
I didn’t really know anyone, not that that fact surprised me, and I sat in the first row. A man struck up a conversation, respectfully questioning my experiences with GRUEs, and we discussed the kink communities in our more local areas. I saw the blank agenda board, listened to Graydancer (a person I at least somewhat know), and then watched the board fill up with classes.
I love the structure of GRUEs. How people write their passions regardless of experience and then pursue curiosities and other passions throughout the day. I love that these things will never be alike for that reason, that I can get up and go wander from one class to another without fear of offending.
I did give a big hug to Graydancer to start my day off right. Then took off for a class on orgasm control – one of my favorite kinks. Everyone was sharing in the dialogue of the discussion – not an uncommon thing at all for these events, and I realized that I was incredibly lucky to orgasm as frequently and easily as I do. I also felt torn about being there, as there was another class happening at the same time that I wanted to do as well.
So off I wandered after a bit to the Morning Wake Up and Energize class and did some mediation and stretches outside where fortunately the rain had cleared up. This is how I should always start my day though I rarely do.
Then I attended a class where they were discussing and teaching about body manipulation. These classes are more directed rather than direct instruction, and so many people came together and collaborated on so many different ways to move a person. I had some good ideas, though many required one partner to be stronger than another.
Lunch was served, tacos and a pleasant conversation with a gorgeous Asian woman who was into fire play – both as performance and kink.
I wandered from class to class and found myself really engaged in a large discussion identifying as a switch. It left many questions that deserve its own post (notice a trend? There’s so much to talk about!).
I watched about cutting off clothes – he even had two women try different types of clothes (like bras vs no bras) and I have a few ideas. It was very hot, and he was so enthusiastic and passionate about it. Sadistic rope was presented by someone I was vastly entertained by at Ropecraft, and I had been tied in many of the things that were shared, cringing in remembrance and laughing at other’s reactions. Pole dancing techniques were being shared and I am always in awe of the strength and conditioning, not to mention the bruises and challenges that go into maneuvering around the pole (I took a few classes, and it really hurt the skin).
The fire class was the last class and one that I had been looking forward to since lunch conversation. The woman I spoke to was co-presenting, and she began by discussing fire safety and put out the fire a few times with her mouth. The man presented different ways to share fire with a partner, another woman being the demonstration bottom. She was bare, but still I cringed at the one point when he took a fire wand right to her pubic bone.
There was still a bit of time and no class afterwards from the fire, so after the presentation by the two, he asked if anyone wanted to try either the top or the bottom side. I asked if I could experience it as a bottom.
Negotiations were no pubic area as I had hair there. He asked if I was fully comfortable getting naked on stage, which I was. As I laid on my stomach, he took the fire wand and blew the heat and flame across my body; during the demonstration I thought that this looks so sensual and sexy, and it felt amazing – a slight fanning of heat. Then he took a paint brush with alcohol and painted patterns on my skin before setting it on fire, brushing his hand to put it out; I liked the sensations of the heat followed by the caress of a hand. Next, he sprayed his hand and spanked my skin with his fire hand; honestly I couldn’t feel much of a difference from a regular spanking, though I definitely did when he reversed it and sprayed my skin to set it on fire and spanked it out. My most sensitive places with fire play were the back of my thighs and my lower back – the same with wax play from candles.
At his instruction, I rolled over and he painted in the valley between my breasts to set that on fire. He suggested that seeing it was far different than just feeling it, so my head was raised to view my own skin being set to flame, the blue and slightly yellow tinge flame being swallowed by his large hand. He followed the curves along the bottom of my breasts and then those heated up.
He asked about nipple sensitivity and permission to show me, then lit those on fire. It felt hotter – painful like my lower back though also sparked pleasurable sensations – my nipples do appreciate a bit of pain.
When we were done and as I was getting dressed, closing circle was called. This is the “aftercare of the the GRUE” where people expressed their thoughts of the day, a way to decompress before being sent out into the world in search of dinner.