In reading the article, Why Can’t We Just Talk About Sex, I couldn’t agree more. It seems that it is never okay to discuss sex, unless with a married partner or a doctor. Especially the point that: “For one thing, it perpetuates the idea that sex is shameful, because we must keep it a secret. For another, it prevents people from benefitting from the experience and wisdom of others. Nobody automatically knows how to have great sex”.
I went out with a group of people that I game with, a man was commenting that reading some of the posts that I had written had greatly helped him understand why and what his girlfriend was asking for in the bedroom. And it gave him some new ideas to approach her with. When I went into a few pointers about the nonsexy stuff, like stiffness or down time, injury, etc.., another friend commented that he needed to take notes, as advice like this didn’t come around often.
And that’s sad. We all need to share advice, I wish that I had started reading blogs long ago, and not been misled by porn or porn novels of the more unrealistic kind. I would have been more comfortable in my own sexuality and exploration of my desires far sooner had I found the awesome bloggers that I read today.
I also, “like to make sure that my friends and acquaintances know that I’m available to talk about sex if they want to start a judgment-free conversation about it. I think it can be helpful to share your experiences with someone if you want reassurance that a particular interaction was normal or healthy,” though sadly I am finding that is is not always the case. By me opening up the conversation of sex, many feel that I must be extremely promiscious, that even I was I should somehow be ashamed of myself, of my knowledge base and experience. I am often judged, even by those in the same breath who say that they do not judge me. And how I longed for the longest of times that my sexuality was normal and healthy – it wasn’t until recently that I’ve truly become empowered by this and embraced it.
Thank goodness to the sex bloggers out there – for the sharing of their experiences, for the good, for the bad, for the honest posts, for creating at least some places where we can talk about sex in a healthier, more positive, light. Because I know I’ve not had much success in person.