I’m a flirt. It kinda seems to run in my family. I think I learned from the best because I know of no better flirt than M. Although she seems tiny and quiet, you get her going and she could charm the pants off anyone.
We’re both equal opportunity flirts. Meaning girl parts or boy parts, you’re going to get flirted with. I’m straight, or as it says on my fet page: heteroflexible. I’d include a girl at the behest of my partner, but they don’t do anything for me sexually. I love the strip club and can appreciate a beautiful woman, but again, I don’t get sexual gratification from them. As far as I know, M pretty much follows the same lines.
Yet, to watch both of us, we flirt way harder with women. Perhaps because it is safe. Most of the time our flirting is harmless banter, and maybe we feel more free with that because other women (who know we’re straight) don’t take that as anything BUT harmless banter. I must say, I’ve appreciated the blurred lines with men sometimes. Opportunities have arisen where I had no idea they would, simply because the man took the banter and used it as initiative.
There’s a seedy underworld to being a natural flirt however. Jealousy being the biggest. I’ve seen it directed at both M and I from women whose partners, or even just interests, we’ve inadvertently flirted with. I’ve noticed it far more with M than I. I’ve a few theories about this: M flirts with the ease and frequency as one does breathing, and she doesn’t realize it. If M doesn’t realize she’s flirting, she definitely doesn’t pick up on 3rd party social cues about jealousy. It’s an emotion she doesn’t really experience herself. People naturally gravitate towards M and her bubbly, easy to like personality. I’ve really yet to meet anyone who doesn’t like her, except those who get jealous over her.
Then there’s the other side. I’ve had an especially hard time dealing with some of my partners who have felt threatened, especially because I enjoy open relationships, so this flirting isn’t seen as harmless. It’s viewed as pursuit. I’m very envious of M and the relationship she has with her spouse. He knew he was getting a flirt when he married her, and not only is tolerant, he encourages her to be her flirty, bubbly self. I’ve yet to be so fortunate. At best I’ve had a don’t ask, don’t tell policy. They know I do it, it’s just better that it not be anywhere near them.
It’s natural for people to flirt. Especially in the kink community. Most of my socializing is in the fet community, and there’s no WAY you could get a group of kinky people together without that kink coming up. That’s also where I’ve experienced the most virulent hatred from jealousy. The strange double standards that exist among some people in the community really boggles my mind.
So although we do it, it’s naturally. It’s harmless, and M and I are both blunt enough that if we’re inviting you to bed, you’ll know it.